Today I go back for another progesterone test. My first test showed that I had a level of .02 so I'm not very positive that it will be anywhere close to a 15. I am usually a pretty positive person but this whole infertility journey has really sucked the Mary Poppins out of me if you know what I mean. Some days I want to take her spoon full of sugar and stick it where the sun don't shine, but I keep moving forward. I will face whatever I have to face in order to find my gold at the end of our rainbow. Being pregnant and having a baby seems so far from my current reality and I really need something positive from Dr. Sparkle and soon.
This weekend I was watching my husband play softball enjoying the nice weather and people watching. Of course there were about 5 babies and a few pregnant women in the mix. They are everywhere! Me and my stupid jealousy. I actually had a beer because with .02 I knew there wasn't a risk of me being pregnant and relaxed. Well... I relaxed as much as I can relax in my current state of craziness.
My new love of running continues. I have actually made it a few weeks which is pretty stellar for me with my track record of working out. My new shoes will be here this week so I'm sure that I will take off at least a second/mile. haha. Okay well I'm sure my feet and joints will at least thank me for it because my other shoes are over ten years old. I had only worn them a dozen times but there is a shelf life that has obviously passed.
I am also finishing up on some pictures from a wedding I shot a few weeks back. The young bride told me that they were going to wait a while before trying to have a baby. Of course I chimed in and told her to take some time to enjoy her husband but don't wait forever. She is only 20 so age isn't a current factor. I told her at my age the clock stops ticking and is just a constant hummmmmmm. She smiled and giggled that cute, young fertile smile. Ugh.